Key Part Of Vegan Diet Involves Telling People You’re On A Vegan Diet


VEGANS around the world have confirmed that sticking to a strict vegan diet involves as a core component, never shutting up about the fact you are a vegan.

“Obviously, a big part of it is the food, but just as cleansing, edifying and nutritious is being able to talk to as many people as possible about how I’m a vegan,” explained Dublin-based vegan, Orla Foley.

Not consuming meats products and eggs is central to Veganism, alongside other less well known aspects such as sending terminally ill animals to Disneyland for one last chance at experiencing joy, however increasingly the pronouncements of one’s Veganism takes centre stage.

“Yeah, when I started up this vegan stuff, I found myself quite blocked up, ya know, but then I was told I shouldn’t refrain from telling people about my vegan diet,” explained another vegan Martin Prendeville, “and once I cornered 10, 15 people in work and started lecturing them about Veganism, Jesus, my constipation just disappeared. I’ve kept up that part ever since”.

Some people new to the vegan way of life focus too much on telling people in exhaustive nauseating detail about how they’re basically saving the human race, but fall down on the vegan part of the diet as they much down on endless burgers after a night out.

Getting the food/talking about being vegan balance has proven to be incredibly important, as evidenced by a recent incident in a Cork office.

Sandra Healy, who had been a vegan for 3 days, but had neglected to tell anyone before spontaneously combusting in front of coworkers.

“She turned really red and started shaking, she obviously wanted to say something and then bang, she burst into flames,” Healy’s coworker Eoin Gowan explained to WWN. “Ironically, she smelled like bacon.”