Little Girls To Receive 14% Less Presents From Santa Than Little Boys


LITTLE girls in Ireland will be in for a big disappointment when they rush into their living rooms on Christmas morning, as it has been revealed that they will receive an average of 14% less gifts than their male counterparts.

Although deemed unfair, this discrepancy is lower than the 17% gender toy gap seen across Europe, which is as high as 27% in the United States.

Elves at the North Pole cited differences in toy choices, and poor negotiating during the letter-writing stage as reasons why girls receive less toys than boys. Others suggested that girls who only play with their toys part-time are dragging down the average, although many sources believe that the gap is motivated by nothing other than sheer discrimination.

Although there have been calls in the past for toy equality regardless of gender, senior members of the North Pole committee for toy distribution seem content that the situation is not one to be concerned about.

“You get the odd little girl complaining that she didn’t get as much as her brother, so we stick her on the naughty list and it shuts the rest of them up,” said one NP Industries spokes-elf we talked to.

“There’s only ever going to be significant changes to the system if one year, every little girl decided to stop leaving out milk and cookies for Santa. Until then, we can get away with shafting them on their yearly toy income without much fear”.

The majority of little boys who were asked to stand up on behalf of equality stated that they didn’t see how it concerned them, and went back to playing with their toys.