Jordan Spieth’s Clubs Test Positive For Performance Enhancing Drugs


THE golfing world has been rocked by revelations that the clubs belonging to current world number one Jordan Spieth have tested positive for performance enhancing drugs.

The shocking news comes just hours after Spieth, a clean athlete himself, celebrated winning the Tour Championship and an incredible payday of $10 million dollars.

His phenomenal array of golfing talents has secured Spieth 5 victories this year, including two majors, but golfing authorities face a difficult decision after Speith’s bag of golf clubs made a teary admission late yesterday evening.

“I believe it was Jordan’s seven iron that came forward first, stating that he couldn’t keep up with the world number one’s demands, so took to steroids instead,” golfing journalist Gregory Jameson told WWN.

The 14-club bag is set to face tough questions, with many coming from Speith himself, who sources claim is said to be devastated by his bag’s betrayal.

So far no golf balls have been implicated in the use of performance enhancing drugs, however, Spieth’s driver was said to have taken two weeks off earlier in the year to enter an intensive rehab program but failed to get clean.

“How the hell are we supposed to keep up with this guy? He’s trying to win everything and he’s bloody well doing it,” a distraught seven iron is believed to have said in an official confession to the USPGA.