Mam Just Wondering When You’re Going To Get Married

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WATERFORD Mother Anna Gerathy has politely inquired as to when her daughter, 29-year-old Sarah Gerathy, is planning on getting married.

The genial question has been posed by Anna just 800 times this year alone, but the mother of three married daughters and one who just doesn’t seem to care, posed this latest iteration of the question with a gentle smile, thus defusing the situation of any tension.

“I’m just wondering, God, that’s all,” Anna confirmed.

“I think you need a boyfriend for that to happen Mam,” Sarah responded as she flicked through the latest issue of Cosmopolitan, forcing her 62-year-old mother to change tactics.

“Well, you won’t find him in there, will you?” Anna asked, in a sarcastic tone that also contained a trace of seriousness.

Anna then went on to continue talking for the next ten minutes, speculating on the various ways Sarah could potentially die in that flat of hers alone and no one would find her for days because she obviously thinks being married is some sort of con job altogether.

“What if you died slipping in the shower, the mortification of a stranger finding you naked, wouldn’t much rather it was your husband who found you dead and naked?” Anna opined.

The polite insistence that Sarah get married within a year or face utter ruin reached boiling point when Anna suggested her daughter consider going to Lisdoonvarna next year.

“Oh, so Lisdoonvarna is too good for you is it? Well, your sister is telling me you’re dating the internet and look where that’s got you,” Anna concluded as Sarah left the room in search of some peace and quiet.

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