Rome Actually Built In A Day, New Archaeological Evidence Reveals


ARCHAEOLOGISTS investigating several sites in the city of Rome have unearthed new evidence that suggests the ancient city was actually built in one day, contrary to previous beliefs.

“Using carbon dating we were able to pinpoint exactly when Rome was constructed,” lead researcher and tweed enthusiast Prof. Sergio Capancho told WWN. “Construction began shortly after sunrise on the 22nd of July 798 BC, and the city was completed some 23 and a half hours later, making it the fastest erected city in the history of the civilised world, beating Dubai by a staggering three weeks”.

It is believed that an estimated 1.7 million construction workers were drafted in by a local legend named Romulus, who paid each man twenty pieces of gold for their hard work.

“It was some achievement in fairness,” Professor Capancho explained. “People were a lot more productive back then and buildings were far less complicated to build. The average worker could finish two houses in one day. There was nearly four million homes erected in Rome that day over two and a half thousand years ago. An incredible feat considering the average build time today is about 6 months per home.”

There has been outrage from linguistic experts and turn of phrase enthusiasts as the phrase ‘Rome wasn’t built in a day’ has now been rendered null and void.

“What’s next? You’re going to tell us everyone does know their arse from their elbow? We might as well just revert to emojis and admit defeat,” a disconsolate Professor of English Martin Redmond told WWN.