Dublin Lad Dislocates Shoulder Throwing Shapes


VINCENT’S accident and emergency department was faced with yet another troubling case of a Dublin male being treated by staff following a dislocated shoulder due to excessive shape-throwing.

Throwing shapes has been an important part of Dublin culture over the last 100 years as hard as nails bastards and hard as nails bastards in training seek to stamp their authority on the air around them by aggressively walking on the city’s streets.

However, as the evolution of throwing shapes continues, recent trends have seen young inner city males become increasing gregarious in the movements with experts fearing severe injuries will be incurred.

One such victim of over elaborate and aggressive gesticulations was 14-year-old Smithfield resident Anto Daly, a self-described ‘mad cunt’. While out with friends for another day’s harmless intimidating of the elderly, Daly looped his shoulder too fast and too wide resulting in a popping noise which was later revealed to be a dislocated shoulder.

“We’re now the premier specialists in this country at putting hard as nails bastards’ shoulders back into place,” explained Dr. Peter Curran of St. Vincent’s.

“Despite our best efforts, we find the same people coming back into A&E as they just can’t seem to curb their wide and menacing stance, we just urge everyone out there to throw their shapes responsibly,” Dr. Curran concluded.

In the most alarming case ever recorded 29-year-old Deco Kinsella lost both his arms in 2009 after repeatedly ignoring warnings about excess shape-throwing.