Teenage Girls Exiled From ISIS After Running Up Huge Phone Bills


THE three teenage girls who left London to join ISIS have returned to England this morning, after being expelled from the radical Islamist group for running up a massive phone bill.

Amira Abase (15), Shamima Begum (15) and Kadiza Sultana (16) flew from London to Istanbul 6 days ago after lying to their parents about just going down to the shops. The trio then joined with ISIS forces in Syria, with reports coming in that they had been radicalised via social media messaging with members of the terrorist group over the past year.

Amid fears that the girls would quickly be married off to ISIS fighters, counter-terrorism authorities were today shocked when the three girls arrived back in Heathrow, along with a message from a senior IS fighter which claimed that fighting for the formation of an Islamic State in the Middle East was a doddle compared with coping with teenage girls.

“You should see our fucking phone bill after just one week,” said Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, Amir of the extremist group.

“Not only that, they used up all our free data, so we couldn’t send out this week’s beheading video. It was a nightmare. We were all supposed to go throw some gay men off the edge of a cliff the other day, but we missed it because they spent the whole morning getting dressed. I wouldn’t mind, but they had only one choice of Burka”.

Further statements from the vicious group complained of the teenagers non-stop bickering about the other girls in the platoon, as well them giving away key strategic information about the whereabouts of ISIS fighters due to constantly posting selfies on Instagram.

Having returned to England this morning, the teenagers are expected to be questioned as to why they wanted to join a group known for their extreme brutality, as social media reacted with a “ISIS Can Keep Those Girls” viral campaign.