Aboriginal Man Spends Majority Of Australia Day Unemployed And Drunk


AN UNINVITED group of indigenous Aboriginals took to the streets yesterday to protest and interrupt Australia Day parades which celebrate the uninvited colonisation of the continent.

One Aboriginal man Adoni Arrernte however, was unable to attend as he has finally been ground down by countless acts of neglect, belligerence and racism on the part of successive Australian governments.

“What’s the fucking point mate,” Adoni confirmed as the unemployed man, bereft of dignity, decided to turn to drink. “No ones gonna hire a feckin’ Abco!”

The poor quality of life enjoyed by some indigenous Australians continues to be the source of much debate in Australia with poor health, education and substance abuse problems affecting many. The reluctance of successive Governments to enter into formal legal agreements over self-determinism for indigenous Australians continues to cause problems.

While the Australia Day parades displayed an array of different ethnic cultures which have long marked out Australia as a country with a large immigrant population from all corners of the World. Many were less keen to acknowledge Australia’s sort of awful colonial legacy.

“I just think it’s really insensitive that they chose Australia Day of all days to try and remind people what was here before we made Australia,” offered member of the public Aaron Dunleavy, who’s great-great grandfather spent most of his life behind bars for murder.

“There’s a time and place to protest the horrible fallout from foreign invaders and the day in which we actually celebrate that with zeal is not that day,” explained parade participant Alex Kyriakos, “we’ve all seen Rabbit Proof Fence now, I even have it on DVD, you can’t expect anymore from people”.

Government officials confirmed that Australia Day was indeed a terrible choice of day when it came to protesting the historical legacy created by murders, rapes and massacres of the Aboriginal communities.

“Ah, come-on, we’re trying to have a good time here, respect our culture. Grab a flag – give it a wave and maybe we’ll talk about it some other time,” a government spokesman said, copying and pasting the statement issued every year on Australia Day.