Illuminati Meet To Discuss What To Do About YouTube User HenryBigBallz93
The leaders of the shadowy secret society known as The Illuminati, believed to be behind countless global conspiracies in a bid to establish a New World Order, have met in an undisclosed location to decide what should be done about a video blogger known as HenryBigBallz93, who is spilling their secrets on YouTube.
HenryBigBallz93, whose real name is Stephen Bigballz, has been posting videos on his YouTube channel for years exposing a range of Illuminati activities, ranging from involvement in the 9/11 terrorist attacks to the murder of rapper Tupac Shakur, in a bid to help the rest of the world wake up and be as smart as he is.
The 21-year-old Arts student from Carlow first became aware of the sinister cabal at a house party in Leighlinbridge, and set about spreading the truth on YouTube the next day. To this date, his channel has garnered dozens of subscribers, with his last video, the 39 minute “How The Paris Attacks Were Predicted By Coolio”, racking up over a hundred views.
However, Bigballz’ work has not gone unnoticed by the hundreds of thousands of worldwide Illuminati members, who called a special meeting of the organisation to decide how best to deal with the troublesome truth-seeker.
“Something must be done about HenryBigBallz93” said one member, speaking to a congregation which included Barack Obama, Jay-Z, Roy Keane and Shania Twain.
“C’mon lads, we’re the same guys who killed JFK, started every war for the past 500 years, brought down Malaysian Airlines MH370 and had The A-Team cancelled. Can we not deal with this one lad broadcasting our secrets from his laptop using the free Wi-Fi in McDonalds?”.
The meeting of the Machiavellian sect is expected to go on for the rest of the week, with some members arguing that Bigballz could be silenced by a decade of countrywide austerity measures imposed by a puppet government or by increasing the number of Chem-trail flights over Carlow, while others have been urging the group to stop over-thinking things and just give him a bit of a kicking.