Taoiseach’s Christmas Address Criticised For Not Telling Public Where To Buy Elsa Dolls

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TAOSIEACH Enda Kenny’s annual Christmas address came under fierce criticism from even his most staunch supporters as he failed to tackle the big issues facing the country in the run up to Christmas and beyond.

The Taoiseach’s address, although quite brief, failed to touch upon what concerns most Irish people ahead of Christmas – the shortage of Elsa dolls.

Cinema behemoth Frozen swept all before it at the box office this year, meaning the Elsa doll is the most in demand gift for the majority of children but is virtually sold out here in Ireland. The shopping rush which ensued here in Ireland has so far claimed 42 lives.

“Where’s the fecking task force this? Never mind the banking inquiry or that mother and baby home stuff. Real, ordinary people want real answers,” self confessed man on the street Mark Holland said while being interviewed by WWN.

Many were incensed by the Taoiseach’s apparent contempt for what the Irish public care about.

“Eh, what were the guards playing at, seizing all those fake dolls? In cahoots with Enda that much is clear,” said desperate parent Eoin Bradley as searched through bins outside Dublin port customs office in the vain hope of finding a discarded doll.

Parents up and down the country see the speech as a clear sign that the country has a lack of leadership. Without advice on whether Ebay, Toy shops or their dodgy mate Quinny is the best option for getting an Elsa doll, civil Irish society remains troubled by another political ‘cockup’.

“I’m not sure why it’s Enda’s fault, yet but I’ll figure it out eventually, a bit of perspective wouldn’t hurt him” Bradley added.

A source close to the Taoiseach revealed exclusively to WWN that opposition parties petitioned to scrap all talk on the banking inquiry and other Dáil business in favour of establishing a cross-party committee to focus solely on the great Elsa doll drought of 2014 but the Fine Gael leader declined.

“Any chance he’d like, screw his noggin’ back on and get a grip. There are real issues facing people on the streets out there. And there he is in his ivory tower, not even trying to source some Elsa dolls, it’d make ya sick,” confessed concerned Irish woman Nora Bellamy.

The office of the Taoiseach refused to comment on the case of a Carlow woman who sold her kidneys in exchange for an Elsa doll.

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