TDs To Try Go Whole Week Without Having Dáil Adjourned Every 5 Minutes


THE public has responded positively to news that politicians from all sides of the political divide are trying extra hard this week not to bring about adjournments in the Dáil due to petty point scoring and bickering.

It has been hailed as a landmark moment as all previous weeks in this incarnation of the Dáil have been characterised by its distinct passion and talent for reducing any and all debates to a series of loud noises and belligerence.

“I had them all down as a waste of time, energy and effort, but I think if they manage to do this – the five minutes without screaming nonsensically at one another, they’ll have new found respect,” explained a member of the public and voter Ed Scannell.

Much of the recent sittings in the Dáil have seen a number of opposition TDs clash with Government TDs while taking the time to state how fabulously they conduct themselves in the house of the Oireacthas.

Bookmaker Paddy Power however, has already paid on several punters who placed money on nothing every changing in Irish politics.

The Dáil was once known as a place of serious debate thus giving the impression elected representatives had the capacity and foresight to effect positive change in Irish society. This impression has since changed with the majority of the electorate believing it to be the place civil debate goes to die.

“I think they were supposed to be debating children been taken under the care of the State but all I heard was your man with the head telling your one with the face to ‘go away and shite’. And that’s all I got from the six hours I watched,” explained disgruntled Dáil viewer Martin Buckley.

The Dáil sits tomorrow to debate important issues, but it is presumed that will end shortly after the session begins when someone calls someone something or other and then someone starts shouting at someone for some reason because they don’t like the cut of someone’s jib or something.