Man Running On Road Too Good To Run On Footpath Like Everyone Else


AMATEUR athlete David Graham was met with several beeps and rude hand gestures from motorists yet again today following another bold decision to run on the road instead of the given footpath – like everyone else.

Graham, who took part in a mini marathon once, told WWN it was ‘his right’ to run on the road if he damn well pleases, even if there was a footpath available.

“I’m actually quite fast and the other joggers just get in my way,” claimed the 42-year-old, while over animating a stretch routine. “So what if I run on the road anyway? I pay my taxes. Just because all the other slow coaches use the footpath it doesn’t mean I have to. I ran a mini marathon once. Did you know that?”

The father of children later slammed motorists for beeping at him as they past, claiming the act was dangerous and could cause him to veer into traffic with fright.

“Sometimes I’m going so fast that when someone beeps it throws me a bit and I lose control of my legs,” he said, making sure to restart his iphone running app again. “Motorists need to be more careful; there are other fine tuned machines also using the road, and they’re not made from metal.”

A source who regularly travels on Mr. Grahams running route stated that he wouldn’t mind if the running man kept into the side, but instead makes sure to run dead center of the car lane.

“I’m all for people getting fit an that, but why the hell does he have to delay everyone else in the process. Every evening it’s the same thing. He never moves over, even a little bit the cunt.” he said. “If he was driving a car like that he’d be booked for dangerous driving.”

Regardless of everyone’s view on the matter, Mr. Graham vowed to keep running on the road for as long as he lives – a tempting solution for critics who are burdened by his stance.