TDs To Debate ‘Ireland’s Favourite Colour’ On First Two Weeks Back In Dáil
AHEAD of the Dáil reconvening for leaders’ questions on the 17th of September, it has been confirmed that TDs are set to debate Ireland’s favourite colour for the first two weeks back in chambers.
In an effort to appeal to the public and show that politicians have a real ear for what the public cares about, TDs will breathlessly bicker over the merits of several very contentious colours.
“This is why the public elected us, to get to the bottom of these incredibly serious issues,” explained Tánaiste Joan Burton before being heckled by a nearby Sinn Féin deputy who stated “you’re only a pox, green is the obvious choice”.
While green is an early favourite, the debate is set to centre on which particular shade of green is most pleasing and representative of Ireland. The order of business in the houses of the Oireachtas has been cleared for several weeks in anticipation of fierce debating.
The coming weeks will hopefully dispel the myth that politicians can’t work together effectively with a decision on what the Nation’s favourite colour is to be reached after 176 hours of shouting, 12 assaults, 2 deaths and countless court cases.
“We like to ease ourselves back in after the tough summer recess,” explained An Taoiseach Enda Kenny, “we’ll get to the serious stuff of debt repayment, the mess the HSE is in and all that after the next election maybe”.
‘Forest green’ has been heavily backed in the bookies but a late surge from ‘Fern green’ has seen Fianna Fáil members cancel previous engagements to rally around the little favoured ‘Kelly green’.
Leaders of each party will be given 3 hours to state the case for each colour choice, while independent TDs will given 20 minutes each. Rumours are circulating that Mick Wallace will wear a specially made pink onesie for the occasion, choosing to forgo any speech.
While it is believed that Emerald green has not been considered at all, despite its obvious connection to Ireland. A special cross-party committee set up late last year concluded that is ‘actually a bit gank’.
The cost to the tax payer for the committee was €1.7 billion.