Iceland Will Melt If Volcano Erupts, Warn Scientists



THE entire island of Iceland will melt if Bardarbunga volcano erupts, scientists have warned today in a dramatic last attempt to evacuate the region.

“You are all going to drown!” informed lead seismologist Dr. Ken Hackman at an emergency televised press conference this morning. “Lava and ice just doesn’t go together. Are you people crazy? What the hell are you even doing here? Ice. Land. Hello!!????”

The risk of an eruption at the volcano has increased ten fold, after a series of earthquakes in the region were recorded by Dr. Hackman and his team.

Local authorities have raised the melting level to blue, the highest warning level there is for a country made entirely from ice.

“I know it doesn’t sound that bad, but blue is pretty bad let me tell you.” said Mayor of Reykjavík, Dagur Bergþóruson Eggertsson. “We did think about making the top warning level red, but then it wouldn’t sound all melty and icey if you know what I mean. The problem now is that when people hear there is a blue warning in place, they assume it’s not that serious enough to act on.”

“In hindsight, we should have really made it red.” he added.

Iceland’s population of 325,671 have been warned to evacuate the floating country of ice as soon as possible. Before it melts into the sea.