Nation That Gave Banks €80 Billion Can’t Compensate Mother & Baby Home Victims

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THE GOVERNMENT has confirmed that they will not seek to add the victims of abuses within Mother & Baby homes to an abuse redress scheme, despite recommendations to do so from an inquiry into the Tuam grave site.

Reinforcing its commitment to ensure Ireland only ever considers large scale payouts for large faceless corporations which have acted recklessly, and are at risk of going bust, the government explained that they simply didn’t have the money for such trivial things.

“A lot of victims are long dead, dead, or nearly dead. We’re just not seeing the need to compensate them. I think the bank guarantee is an unfair comparison to make because those things were living, breathing little homes to money. It’s not the same, people and banks are different. We need banks, I can’t cite any research that says people are as important,” a Department of Finance spokesperson explained.

“This is a very complex situation, there’s too much of a possibility that people will forward with genuine claims. It’s complex, legally speaking. Who knows to what extent these homes have abused and neglected children, that would open us up to huge scale payouts that would be a fraction of the €80 billion placed on taxpayers for the bank collapse. It’s complex,” explained one government spokesperson.

The spokesperson went on to use the word ‘complex matter’ in the hope that such words would confuse people struggling to comprehend why maintaining the repayment of bank debt is an easy thing to understand but compensating victims of abuse is just a step too far.

“Legal implications complex an already complex legal implication, and complications would complicate the complication further,” the spokesperson added, making no sense.

The government is thought to be considering an alternative redress scheme which would see the church pay the bulk of the costs despite previous efforts to have the church pay victims of abuse resulting in a strongly worded ‘piss off’ from religious orders.

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