Student Breaks World Record For Stripping Down And Re-Assembling Four-Colour Pen

A STUDENT in UCD has this morning broken the World Record for stripping-down and reassembling a Bic four-colour pen in the fastest time, clocking an effort at 00:52.76 seconds which beat the previous top time by nearly 3 seconds.

Barry McArdle, a second year Economics student from Meath, performed the high speed feat during a particularly boring Statistics lecture.

Working on a standard blue-and-white Bic four-colour biro, the young man timed himself on his phone as he broke it down into it’s 18 individual components and then quickly reassembled it.

McArdle had originally bought the four-colour pen at the start of the semester, during a burst of positivity about the upcoming school year. With a four-colour pen in tow, the 19 year old believed he was set for a productive year of study, with four different coloured inks to use while taking down notes in class; red for headings, black for writing, blue for doing diagrams, and green for drawing lines or something.

But when the black and blue ink ran out, McArdle turned his attentions on stripping the pen to see how the inside worked, while sometimes pretending that it was a spaceship or a gun from Halo. Weeks of ignoring lectures to focus on his skills have paid off, as he finds himself in the Guinness book of world records.

“I’m just so delighted, to be honest, ” said a jubilant Mr. McArdle, who took the rest of the day off to celebrate. “Everything came together for me this morning; the springs didn’t fly everywhere, the clicky bits all clicked in without any hassle… It’s a dream come true”.

The overjoyed student will be presented with his World Record Holder certificate later in the year, which classmates have predicted will be the only certificate he receives during his time in college.