Man Wouldn’t Have Taken Promotion In Work If He Knew It Meant More Work


A LOCAL DUBLIN man is wondering if it will reflect badly on him if he tells his bosses in work he no longer want the promotion he was granted last week, on account of the fact he was under the impression it would require ‘fuck all work’.

“I was very interested in the pay bump, but also what really appealed to me was what I now realise is a misplaced belief that all my superiors do fuck all work,” said Galway man Alan Tanlon, who finds himself the unwitting victim of the hypothesis first explored by philosopher Biggy in his seminal work ‘Mo Money Mo Problems’.

“I had wrongly thought gaining this promotion would mean that very Irish thing of almost apologising to friends and family for having ambition so you go on and on and on about how you’re ‘up to your eyes’, but I thought that was all bullshit and that I’d actually be able to coast a bit and delegate to the team beneath me,” said Tanlon as he witness his calendar fill up with meetings and deadlines.

Tanlon claims the ‘system is rigged’ and that by virtue of the fact he’s done 8 years in his current role he has earned the right to not work as hard or harder as he had been.

“Like, what’s the point in working hard if you’re just rewarded with even more work?” questioned Tanlon who sources say should have considered a career in the civil service in a bid to achieve his aims.