Ireland Completely Forgot To Celebrate First Anniversary Of Queen’s Death
A SHAMEFACED Irish nation has today apologised to one another for ‘dropping the ball’ and failing to gleefully acknowledge the first anniversary of the death of former British monarch Queen Elizabeth II.
“Ah I didn’t mind her, but it would have been nice to have some festivities marking the fact they all lost their fucking minds over there,” shared one Irish person who admitted the lapse is further proof Ireland has gone to the dogs.
“That’s not like us at all,” said one genuinely worried Irish person, “were we not meant to get a bank holiday for this? I’d have gone up North to get fireworks if someone reminded me”.
Instances at the time of British people thinking they spotted the deceased Queen in clouds, scones and dog faeces all went unmocked due to Ireland’s preoccupation with contemporary issues closer to home, meaning the first anniversary of Mournageddon went uncelebrated.
“I meant to set a reminder in my phone a minute or two after she died there last year but I got distracted by police arresting people for shouting ‘nonce’ at Prince Andrew,” confirmed another local man, who can’t help cry tears of laughter when he looks back on the insanity of it all.
An initial whip round for bunting, flags and novelty trinkets mocking the Stockholm Syndrome like relationship British people have with their monarchy had occurred but the individuals responsible for organising commemorations lost track of time.
“We can’t let this happen again. There must be accountability. A made to order coffin cake went uncollected, this isn’t on lads. This isn’t who we are, this isn’t Ireland,” confirmed one ashamed local, who was kicking himself for not organising a fancy dress competition in work to mark the anniversary.