A Grieving Family Asked For Privacy, You’ll Never Guess What The Tabloids Did Next


THE SUDDEN passing of a loved who happens to be a prominent public figure has led one family to appeal for privacy during an immensely difficult time, and you’ll never guess what the tabloids did next.

“No, irony? What’s that, I’ve never heard of it,” said one journalist fresh from penning a ‘Who are Sinead O’Connor’s children’ article which promised an intrusion into their lives accompanied with pictures to go alongside articles about how the media had a disinterest in the singer’s music career but morbid fascination with her tribulations.

While much of tabloids resources will be eaten up by hounding thousands of people for comments in a bid to keep churning out content, some junior staff have been handed truly important tasks.

“Oh I’m just, at the request of my editor, scouring the internet for the most recent videos and pictures of O’Connor so we can serve them to tabloid addicted vultures to pick at. I love my job, this is definitely journalism,” added another journalist mulling over which picture or screengrab was sufficiently distressing.

“Nothing says respecting privacy like speculating on funeral arrangements”.

Defending the frantic pace at which there were producing articles about what they felt was delightfully salacious and lurid tragedy porn, one editor was particularly frank.

“Some of our biggest critics are our biggest customers. Keep clicking hypocrites, we’re just providing a service you desperately crave,” the editor said, adjusting the headlines on articles so they would first to appear in Google when people went looking.

Elsewhere, broadsheets have been praised for doing much the same but in a classier fashion.