“She’s Doesn’t Deserve Me” Confirms Husband Hoovering For First Time Since Ireland Adopted The Euro


FEELING a little taken for granted local husband Matt O’Grillan was beginning to question how the division of labour is shared with his wife, Alice, after yet another top-to-bottom, no stone unturned hoovering of 15-19% of the house.

“I always seemed to be lumped with the housework,” confirmed O’Grillan, completing his second half-arsed hoover of the family home since the 1st of January 2002, the same date Ireland adopted the Euro as its currency.

“And not so much as a thanks,” added O’Grillan, who took the decision to hoover only after knocking over the contents of a plant pot while trying to take a cloth to the coffee he spilled on the couch.

O’Grillan pondered how lucky his wife was considering the fact fit and healthy partners who can be relied on to do his fair share are a scarce commodity.

The Waterford man’s wife was unavailable for comment as she was busy taking O’Grillan’s mother to the GP in between picking the kids up from town, doing the shopping and completing a dump run that O’Grillan had put off for months.

“I wasn’t short of offers back in the day, could have had my pick of them. She’s lucky to have me,” said the 47-year-old man, whose toe nails clippings have remained on the bathroom floor since yesterday morning.