Varadkar Returns From Paris Wearing Friendship Bracelet Macron Gave Him


IN THE AFTERMATH of French President Emmanuel Macron reaffirming his country’s support for Ireland in Paris yesterday, Taoiseach Leo Varadkar has returned home sporting a friendship bracelet which he refuses to take off.

Gently caressing the bracelet which had already accumulated some grime and dirt, the Taoiseach was urged by those closest to him to stop butting in on conversations just to say ‘that reminds me of the time I was in Paris’ or ‘my friend Emmanuel’.

It is believe Macron bestowed the friendship bracelet upon Varadkar as the latest symbolic gesture from EU nations vowing to back Ireland and the Good Friday Agreement in the face of Britain taking Britain hostage and demanding Britain be freed from Britain’s basement, where it chained itself to the radiator.

A spokesman for the Taoiseach has denied that the Fine Gael leader downloaded Duo Lingo and vows to learn French or that he refused to eat his breakfast this morning because it wasn’t a croissant and coffee. Unconfirmed reports suggest Varadkar didn’t even take off the bracelet when he showered.

“He’s like those eejits after going to a festival who keep their wristbands on for another 6 months,” confirmed one political observer, who noted Macron has a drawer full of identical friendship bracelets he gives to all international leaders.

Macron, in exchange for the bracelet, had asked Varadkar for help with yellow vests protests, seemingly enquiring as to how the Taoiseach has kept the Irish public so apathetic and adverse to protests and demonstrations.