Meath & Westmeath Meet At Kinnegad For Reunification Talks


DELEGATIONS from the warring counties descended on the border town of Kinnegad, which was chosen as the venue for the first official reunification talks between the two entities.

The People’s Republic of Proper Meath and the Sovereign Socialist Republic County of Westmeath arrived to the demilitarised zone of the Tesco’s car-park, bidding to end a conflict which began centuries ago and claimed the lives of all inhabitants of North and South Meath.

“They should be Eastmeath if we’re calling ourselves Westmeath. They think they’re so great because they’re Meath Meath,” confirmed one delegate whose grandfather’s grandfather fought in the historic battles known as the Great Schmozzle in Slane and the 2am Skirmish At Supermac’s in Athlone.

On the table for discussion is the reuniting of families from both counties, the banishment of all blow ins from Dublin, and the possibility of combining GAA teams although Meath seem reluctant to do so.

“This historic meeting could herald much needed progress. We continue to offer our support,” confirmed UN mediators who were on the scene helping with the aid of translators.

Prominent figures from both counties were present to lend their support to reunification and included Pierce Brosnan, Niall Horan, Robbie Henshaw, a reanimated Joe Dolan and Trevor Giles. Hector Ó hEochagáin attempted to gain entry but was taken out by Meath’s own snipers.

Long cut off from one another with no indication of how the other side lives, Meath brought pictures of their way of life which consisted only of Tayto Park while Westmeath delegates brought pictures of a flooded Athlone.