Local Man Not Sure How He’s Still Alive After Weekend


WATERFORD man Sean Cahill has been hailed as a ‘medical marvel’ after managing to turn up for work this morning following a weekend of drinking and revelry that ‘should have killed him’.

Cahill, 32, went on a massive bender after leaving work at 5pm on Friday evening, during which time the Dungarvan native drank enough alcohol to render him unconscious at 3am on Saturday morning.

The hangover from this leg of the session alone should have killed him, but he somehow managed to pull things together in time to meet the lads for the match before proceeding to drink solidly all the way through the night, passing out just after the result of some MMA fight at 6AM.

To compound his woes, Cahill then had to get up on Sunday at 10AM to go to his 5-year-old niece’s birthday party, where he endured four straight hours of kids singing Taylor Swift songs without a single alcoholic drink in sight.

“We’re conducting tests on Mr. Cahill right now, but he already strikes us as a medical anomaly,” said a doctor of alcohol at Waterford General Hospital.

“If we can find out how his immune system was able to fight off the lethal amount of drink and partying that he put himself through, then we may be able to head to Electric Picnic this weekend without the fear that we’re going to die in a heap by Sunday”.

Mr. Cahill is said to be recovering well, and hopes to regain sensation in his legs shortly.