Kilkenny Declares 3 Weeks Of Mourning


RESIDENTS of Kilkenny are reportedly  unavailable for comment today after the county officially declared it will be taking three weeks of mourning after being defeated by neighbouring rivals Waterford in an All-Ireland qualifier yesterday afternoon.

Shadowing over the now empty streets of Kilkenny city, a black and amber flag flying at half mast over Nolan Park appears to be the only sign of acknowledgement of the unexpected loss.

“Not only is there no one on the ground here, but all social media channels seem to be also void of Kilkenny hurling fans,” WWNs Kilkenny correspondent Karl Breen explains, “usually they’d be giving out about the referee or making some excuse on Facebook, but there doesn’t seem to be anyone stirring at all. The whole county has gone into shut down”.

In a brief statement on the Kilkenny county council page, it was announced the entire population of Kilkenny will officially go into three weeks of mourning, with even the black and amber road signs expected to be covered up with satin cloths.

“They’re obviously very ashamed about what happened yesterday and it’s hard for them to take, so I’m sure they don’t want to be reminded of hurling for the next few weeks,” one expert in losing physcology explains,”you’ve got to think of the impact on the younger generation in Kilkenny too, and how they will remember this traumatic period in their lives. What are they going to do while everyone else is watching the all Ireland final? It’s very sad and I just hope they pull through without too much physcological damage”.

Temporary counciling centres have been erected throughout the county in a bid to help local people deal with their loss.

Meanwhile, Waterford supporters are being urged to stop jeering at Kilkenny people across the river Suir as they haven’t actually won anything worthwhile yet.