“Well It Was Nice While It Lasted” – Democracy


THE AGE old system of government, Democracy, has formally announced its retirement stating ‘well, it was nice while it lasted’.

“I now pass the baton into the incapable and tiny hands of a man who embraces xenophobia, misogyny and the hatred of all things he is simply too impatient and ignorant to bother understanding,” the clearly tired and battle weary ideology confirmed.

While many around the world had presumed Democracy would continue in its current position as the dominant political ideology in the West despite a change in management, it is thought its growing unpopularity amongst sections of the US electorate has seen it make the decision to vacate its profession entirely.

“You have to know when it is time to hang up your hat, and you guys seem quite fond of the man who doesn’t pay income tax and insults war veterans and war veterans’ families,” the descendent of Cleisthenes stated.

Many political experts have speculated that democracy has retired preemptively as it believes president elect Donald Trump will seek to have it deported, owing to the fact that Democracy emigrated from mainland Europe via Greece some years ago.

Democracy has a number of international franchises which may be wound down in the coming years too.

“I think a lot of people are really, really angry with me, so the time to step aside has come. When people question your ability and purpose, you begin to make for the exit sign,” Democracy confirmed.

Despite stating its intention to leave, Democracy is required to give at least 6-months notice, have a hand in training in its successor, All Out Chaos, and going through an awkward exit interview which will see it field questions from over 57 million people who didn’t vote for this.