Shakespeare Breaks Beyoncé’s Record For Number Of Ghostwriters


ENGLISH playwright and bane of schoolchildren’s existence everywhere, William Shakespeare, has been revealed as the new holder of a Guinness World Record, previously held by Beyoncé, WWN can reveal.

With news that 23 academics have confirmed Christopher Marlowe, among countless other writers, contributed to some of the Shakespeare’s most beloved works, the bard has now overtaken music superstar Beyoncé for the largest number of ghostwriters used.

“Our research suggests William got up at about 1pm most afternoons and just shouted a lot of nonsense sounding titles like ‘Taming of the Shrew’ and his factory of lowly writers got to work making sense of it all,” Prof. John Gallow shared with WWN.

While Beyoncé had held the record since the release of her cultural phenomenon ‘Lemonade’, the 35-year-old may be relieved to be rid of the record.

“Shakespeare didn’t have the luxury of remixing or sampling per say, he was apparently very fond of saying ‘I like the sound of that’ when he saw a peer of his writing something down,” Prof. Gallow added.

“You know, like those pricks who copy jokes and pass them off as their own on Twitter and Instagram”.

Shakespeare and Beyoncé’s penchant for drawing on a large circle of collaborators is just the beginning of the striking similarities between the two celebrated artists, Prof. Gallow went on to reveal.

“William had a brother who lived in his shadow, Solange style, who many hipsters maintained was actually the more talented sibling. His name was Glenn Shakespeare. Our research concludes, he was only alright to be honest,” confirmed the professor.