EXCLUSIVE: Cheryl Secretly Gives Birth To 44 Children


WWN has obtained evidence, never seen before by any other publication, which suggests Cheryl Ann Fernandez-Versini has secretly given birth to 44 children in the last 24 hours.

It is not clear why the much loved celebrity sought to offend her fans and the world by not disclosing the news immediately, but thanks to the diligent work of one of our reporters and over 9 months of covert journalism we can reveal we have expertly invaded the singer’s privacy.

“We call it the dogsbody work, you don’t enjoy it, but if it gets the story, gets to the bottom of the truth it’s worth it. And that’s why I disguised myself as a pregnancy test and placed myself in Cheryl’s home and subsequently let her urinate on me,” WWN journalist, and future Pulitzer Prize nominee Anne Trope explained of the sting operation.

“And it did sting, Cheryl’s urine has an acidic quality to it, presume it’s all that food she isn’t eating,” the former Daily Mail journalist and new addition to the WWN team confirmed.

“Which already makes her a terrible mother who should have her kids taken from her if you ask me,” the dedicated journalist added. “Imagine they were kidnapped, Christ that’d be a good story”.

WWN’s Trope then tested positive for a celebrity pregnancy, which are amongst the most sought after pregnancies in the world. We can now confirm that the tabloid media’s obsession with whether or not Cheryl has children or one day will have children, was well founded as the former Girls Aloud singer was so baby crazy she decided to have 44 all at once.

“It’s probably some sort of record,” confirmed an unnamed doctor we made up, “and if anything it proves that all the intrusions visited upon Cheryl’s life are entirely justifiable,” the doctor added using his morally infallible professional opinion.

“Now that she’s had the 44 kids, we can go back to bullying Jennifer Aniston into having one,” the doctor concluded.