Obama Officially Done With America’s Bullshit


IN a stirring address to the American people, a shattered looking US president Barack Obama admitted his patience with America had been exhausted and confirmed he was ‘done with their bullshit’.

“I tried, I really did, but you guys don’t make it easy,” Obama said as he confirmed he was just going to lock himself away in the Oval office until the remainder of his presidential term was up in January.

In recent weeks, America has been affected by a number of high profile tragedies involving firearms and the loss of life, which is something the president would have been able to deal with only for yet more bullshit to come along, causing him further distress.

“I had to endorse someone for president the other day who, if she wasn’t who she is, would be in jail, and I had to do that because there’s a nut job in a toupee trying to get hold of the nuclear codes,” Obama passionately and rather sternly said, as his voice began to rise in anger.

“And a lot of you guys are voting for that wacko. I’m done, I’m frankly done with all your bullshit America,” Obama added now shouting.

Obama, a shadow of the figure who took office 8 years ago, may have had the news of whistleblower Chelsea Manning’s suicide attempt on his conscience too, as well as frustration at Republicans desire to restrict women’s access to abortions and basic healthcare as well as having no desire to update gun restrictions.

“This is officially someone else’s mess to clean the fuck up,” Obama concluded, speaking of the greatest nation on Earth.