Gerry Adams Lights IRA Signal Into Sky From Roof Of Sinn Féin Offices


DESPITE the Dublin skyline being laden down with fog, an unmistakable sight dominated everyone’s view as a long absent sight made its return to the skies.

The IRA signal, a beacon which was used in times gone by, by members of Sinn Féin if they needed help from the paramilitary organisation, scorched the skies once more as Sinn Féin’s leader Gerry Adams took to the roof of his party’s offices, gaining the interest of nearby Gardaí.

It is believed Adams activated the supposedly dormant signal as he is in urgent need of help following the rejection of Sinn Féin by almost 100% of the country’s other left leaning political parties as well as a growing weariness among some voters.

However, Sinn Féin issued a press release some four minutes before Adams took to the roof to switch on the IRA signal, denying he had done such a thing.

“We saw him with our own eyes for Christ sake,” responding Gardaí told Sinn Féin members in the party’s offices, but Gardaí were reminded that Adams was fond of doing things “just for shits and giggles”.

“Ah sure that thing is always malfunctioning,” Adams explained to Gardaí after descending from the rooftop, “to the untrained eye, it would appear as if the signal has never been properly switched off, but the roof is just where I go to do my thinking,” added the party leader.