Outrage From Students As Biggy Smalls Doesn’t Come Up In Poetry Section On English Paper 2


STUDENTS have already begun emerging from their Leaving Cert English Paper 2 examinations in an exasperated state after rapper Biggy Smalls, long thought to be a ‘sure thing’, didn’t turn up as one of the studied poets on the paper.

“Fucking studied ‘Life After Death’ inside out because my teacher said he had to come up, because he hadn’t for the past two years. I’m fucking raging,” explained Colaiste Eoin pupil Geroid Byrne.

Across the country, hundreds of pupils left the exam early such was the level of distress they were feeling after Biggy, also known as The Notorious B.I.G, failed to turn up on the paper.

“Ugh, it’s the last thing I needed,” offered Brona Dwyer, a pupil in St. Muckross College, “I had this line about how his lyrical largesse probably owed something to what a fat fucker he was but nope, screwed over by whoever put together the paper”.

“Fairly devastated like,” Conal Folan from Presentation College in Cork revealed to WWN, “I mean I probably put all my eggs in one basket, but I knew Mo Money Mo Problems inside out and I really thought an A was possible but I nearly shit myself when I couldn’t find him anywhere on the paper”.

While it is a surprise that Smalls did not appear on this year’s paper, the news of poet failing to turn up on the paper will be familiar to anyone who has ever sat the Leaving Cert.

“I was going to do Yeats actually, but Mrs. Murphy convinced me to study up on Biggy so I had ‘Niggas Bleed’ and ‘Fuck You Tonight’ off by heart. Mrs. Murphy has a lot to answer for,” explained Conor Grogan, a pupil from the Institute of Education in Dublin.

Several students were so distraught by the omission of Smalls it is reported that they said ‘fuck it’ and wrote about him anyway.