EXCLUSIVE PICS: Kate Middleton’s Ass Exposed


Kates Ass

WATERFORD Whispers News exclusively brings you Kate Middleton’s ass in all his glory.

We have been given exclusive rights by the Middleton estate to show you the first ever images of the Duchess of Cambridge’s donkey, Dingo, who has been in the family for almost 19 years.

The dingo was generously rescued by Kate’s father Michael Middleton after the animal was found malnourished at the side of a road, presumably left there by a band of pykie peasants who were earlier moved on from the site via bulldozer.

Kate immediately took to the animal and named him after her great grandfather Dingo Dalton – earl of tree-houses. However, much to the disappointment of her younger sister Pippa, who wanted to name the donkey Jimmy after her hero ‘Jim Will Fix It, Dingo was Christened in St Andrew’s Bradfield, Berkshire in 1996.

The whole town came to the ceremony as Dingo was the first ever horse-like-animal to receive a Holy sacrament in the history of the British church, excluding Duchess of Cornwall Camilla Parker Bowles of course.

Sources close to the Middleton’s claim that Kate became very attached to her ass and would sometimes sneak out at night to ‘feed the pony’. Pippa was very jealous of their relationship and was quoted as saying: “I will do everything in my power to have a better ass than my sister’.

Time passed by and the children grew older and began boarding school. Dingo would go days without seeing Kate and his health deteriorated as a consequence.

In 2008, Dingo was diagnosed with a rare form of colic and had to have two hundred feet of intestine removed.

Following surgery, Kate and Pippa both agreed to take care of the ass together, hence why you will rarely see both sisters together at the same time.

Dingo still habitats the Middleton estate today, at the ripe old age of 20.

Join us next week when we venture into the world of Prince Harry’s back passage.