‘You’d Understand If You Had Kids,’ Says Local Woman About Fucking Everything

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A WATERFORD woman is currently denying that she has an addiction to starting every sentence with ‘if you had kids then you’d understand’, which friends have stated is one of the key contributing factors to her current unbearability.

Sharon Cusack, 27, has used the words ‘if you had kids then you’d understand’ almost once every five minutes since she gave birth to her first child earlier this year.

Cusack, a dose, has dropped her trademark phrase into conversations ranging from car maintenance to watching Netflix, often in a dismissive, combative manner which shuts down anyone else’s side of the argument, particularly if they are not a parent.

As such, many of Cusack’s pals are currently considering staging an intervention to help her stop using the vexing phrase.

“OK, I don’t have kids, but I’m pretty sure I still know how tricky it is to get a seat on the fucking bus during rush hour,” said one of Cusack’s sisters.

“The way Sharon goes on, you’d swear having kids was like having a shopping trolley full of mice handcuffed to your ankle all day, and nobody could possibly comprehend what it was like. I get it, like; when you have kids, you have less money, less time, less energy, everything takes longer and has to be done more carefully. But it doesn’t make you one of the fucking Avengers, and the rest of us just drooling morons”.

Cusack’s intervention was cut short after she stated that she had to leave early, for reasons the rest of her childless friends wouldn’t understand.

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