New Damien Rice Album The Perfect Soundtrack To Single Man Staring At Photos Of Ex-Girlfriend

ONE of Ireland’s most treasured songwriters, Damien Rice, returns with the release of his third album My Favourite Faded Fantasy and it is set to be a hit with fans and critics alike.

Pre-orders of the album are exceeding expectations as Rice corners several key markets in the fragile music marketplace.

“We’ve had 4,000 pre-orders in Ireland alone,” explained label executive Renee Young, “there has been a huge response from single men who are looking for the ideal soundtrack to their favourite hobby – solemnly staring at pictures of their ex-girlfriends”.

The ‘single man staring at photos of his ex-girlfriend’ demographic is one of the key customer bases left in the music industry and critics to have confirmed Rice’s famously chirpy songs will be hard for them to resist.

“It’s an absolute 5 star belter of a record…if you’re looking to stare at photos of your ex,” said Daniel Rogers writer at music site Pitchfork.

WWN spoke to some fans who just can’t wait to get their hands on Rice’s new songs.

“I find sometimes the songs I’m listening to just induce the wrong sort of crying,” explained single man and ex-girlfriend photo enthusiast Paul O’Riordan, “I was looking at a picture of myself and Julie at the Zoo and Happy by Pharell came on the radio. It just didn’t work… you see I’m not happy I’m fucking miserable”.

Cian Slaney, similarly single to Paul, expressed his delight at the news of Rice’s impending album launch.

“Ah, I can’t wait, I’m there looking at Sarah at John and Susan’s wedding from last year and this Hozier album was doing nothing for me, I’m getting little bursts of tears but I want to proper ball my eyes out.

“Now Damo is back in the picture I think I’ll be able to stare off out into the distance from my bedroom window and think ‘yeah, Sarah was a bitch’, but also ‘oh Christ I miss her so much'” Cian explained.

A third Rice fan, James Cummins, highlighted some of the music hidden qualities. “Sometimes you might want to have a pity wank for yourself and there’s just no other artist out there who can help me save on lube like Damo does, the tears are a perfect substitute”.

Rice’s new album features 8 original compositions and a cover of popular novelty song Monster Mash, written by Bobby Pickett.