Chaos As Passengers Storm Cockpit To Crash Plane After Trad Session Starts On Flight
AN AER LINGUS flight descended into chaos and narrowly avoided disaster after a group of musicians started an impromptu trad session on the Frankfurt to Dublin route.
The flight, initially delayed due to poor weather conditions, got worse for passengers when a perfect storm of the Cavan branch of the Comhaltas Ceoltóirí Éireann and people filming for their TikTok forced some passenger to resort to drastic action.
“I don’t care if we’re still grounded and haven’t taken off, I’m crashing this thing, this needs to end,” a recording from the plane’s blackbox detailed, as an irritated passenger turned insane after being subjected to a 14th jig in a row.
Storming the cockpit armed with only a plastic knives and forks, brave passengers attempted to sacrifice their lives to bring an end to the callous audio terrorism. In the most disturbing incident a passenger, unable to listen to another triumphant ‘yeeeow’ attempted to kill themselves by flushing themselves out the airplane toilet and into the open skies.
“These brave passengers were only doing what any of us would do in a similar situation, they are a study in courage and the best of us. We can never repay them but we can offer these flight vouchers,” read a PR statement from Aer Lingus, issued in a bid to stave off court cases which would have no choice but issue damages in the millions to affected passengers.
UPDATE: For their crimes, the musicians who perpetrated this audio affront have received a lifetime slot on The Late Late.