Woman Now A ‘Sustainability’ Influencer After Fashion, Gym, Make Up & Mindfulness Efforts Fail


A LOCAL influencer is taking her incessant narcissistic online posting in an interesting new direction following her failure to get free stuff when describing herself as a fashion/make-up/mindfulness/gym influencer.

“Ugh, I’ll be honest I really don’t like the label ‘influencer’,” confirmed influencer Casey Cassidy, who has overnight blossomed into a passionate ‘sustainability’ influencer.

“When I was commenting on all the make-up influencer accounts just to get noticed all I got sent was a cheap Chinese eye shadow palette that gave me a rash,” confirmed Cassidy, who has the phrase SheEO in her bio.

Cassidy’s sudden adoption of sustainability was motivated by the fact ethical yoga pants no longer look ‘rank’ and she noticed several influencers get nice weekends away in Ireland with ‘outdoor saunas and shit’.

“Like my brand was mindfulness but I just couldn’t keep up that fake positivity bullshit in other influencer’s comment sections, so now my brand is saving the planet or whatever,” added Cassidy, who will learn the hard way not to post her holidays to Ibiza, Paris, and New York online if she wants to be known as a sustainability advocate.

“I think brands can see I’m genuine and that’s what sustainability is probably about, I haven’t properly looked it up yet, but I’m sure that’s basically it” concluded Cassidy, who would promote nuclear airstrikes on Somalian orphans on her profile if she got a few quid out of it.