Distraught Nation Somehow Finds Way To Carry On


A FEAT of collective bravery seldom witnessed in recorded history, the people of Ireland managed to get out of bed this morning despite the news which broke on RTÉ yesterday evening.

An instance of generational trauma placed somewhere between Bloody Sunday and Brian McFadden leaving Westlife on the list of Ireland’s great tragedies, Ryan Tubridy’s services are no longer required by RTÉ. Is it the most tragic chapter? That is a question for the historians of tomorrow to answer.

There were mile long queues outside RTÉ today. Mourners seeking to understand and process the horror that had unfolded. Man’s inhumanity to man is once again on full display and WWN was there to catalogue the immense heartache the public is feeling.

“What? No, I’m here ‘cus I hear there’s a €170k a year job going for talking shite into a microphone for 5 hours a week,” confirmed one poor disconsolate soul clutching his CV, clearly still in the denial part of the grieving process.

The hollow feeling that comes with this catastrophe can’t but put the frivolous goings on in Maui, Ukraine and beyond in stark perspective.

“I’ll get no work done,” shared one somber office worker, “the memes, they’re flying in the group chat haha”.

And what of the children? The most precious and innocent cohort the nation has. How does one tell them the news, for breaking the news breaks their little fragile hearts too.

“Who?” confirmed children WWN talked to. ‘Who?’ indeed are we, a nation who could let such an outrageous injustice – a man’s employment contract coming to its natural end – happen.

UPDATE: An Post have confirmed several employees have been crushed to death under the weight of the thousands of cards sent to the home of a south Dublin man in the last few hours.