Gardaí ‘Aware’ Notorious American Criminal Due To Visit Clare In Coming Weeks

“WE UNDERSTAND locals in Clare will have been disturbed by rumours a prominent US crime figure will be in the area in coming weeks but gardaí are monitoring the situation and will set aside the appropriate resources,” a garda spokesperson said of US man Donald Trump’s upcoming visit to Ireland.

WhatsApp groups in the Clare area have been awash with rumours and concern, forcing gardaí to issue comments effectively stating that the public will be protected against the impending menace.

“The guards can tell me to relax all they want, this lad is supposedly the DJ Carey of fraud, he’s due a trial in New York. And don’t get me started on the groping stuff,” voiced one local, locking the front door on his house for the first time in years.

Prompting further worry among locals is the fact the US citizen has been declared bankrupt at least six times but advertises himself as a successful businessman everywhere he goes.

“Do not approach the man. Clare businesses are advised to reject all attempts by the individual to pay by cheque as it will bounce,” added gardaí.

Trump is known to try and conceal his face and go undetected by wearing a large red baseball cap. Those easily repulsed are advised not to stare directly at Trump’s sons Eric and Donald Jnr who may be travelling with him.

Prominent objectors to crime-committing foreigners coming to Ireland have already begun protesting outside Doonbeg Hotel and Golf Course, which is set to house Trump for several days.