Runaway Wallaby Had Been Working In Waterford Cafe For Months

A RUNAWAY wallaby that had been missing in Waterford for several months has been apprehended by animal safety personnel after it was discovered the macropod had been working in a Waterford cafe.

The mystery of how the wallaby, Joey, survived for months on end has been explained as he took on a disguise after finding a discarded paddy cap on the street and responded to a ‘help wanted’ sign in the window of a cafe.

“All I saw was the paddy cap when I came in every morning and I just dismissed him as some desperate Peaky Blinder hipster wannabe, and the not talking? I just thought he was from abroad and didn’t have great English,” said the proprietor of Flick The Bean cafe Harry Farren.

Farren said he will be sad to see Joey go back to Waterford Castle Hotel and Resort as he was a Trojan worker and it’s hard to get the staff these day. Interviewing customers it was clear they had cottoned on to the fact Joey was a wallaby early on.

“I wouldn’t know my walla-a from my wallabys but I knew there was something up with him alright, but you don’t ask or point these things out in this day and age, do you? You wouldn’t want to be offending anyone. Plus, he gave me the odd caramel slice for free,” shared one regular.

“None of my business, boi. What? Am I gonna rat him out? That’s not how Waterford does it,” said another regular, who admitted the wallaby made truly horrendous coffee but it’s not the Irish way to complain or make a fuss.