Charles & Camilla To Visit Tipperary For Lessons In Ignoring A Family Member Who’s A ‘Bit Of A Pedo’


COUNTY Tipperary is readying itself for a visit at the end of March by England’s Prince Charles and his wife Camilla, as the Royals embark on a world-wide fact-finding mission to learn how to cope with life after a family member gets outed as having pedo-ish tendencies.

The trip comes after Prince Andrew emerged with a ‘not-not-guilty’ after avoiding the civil case brought forward by a girl he had never met, but that he somehow felt compelled to give £12m of taxpayers money to all the same.

Moving on, Charles will meet with members of Ireland’s government as well as members of the Catholic Church to get tips on how they have handled the various sex scandals to have come their way, although the prince has already laughed off suggestions that his brother could simply be ‘relocated to another monarchy’.

“Using money collected from the public to hush-up and minimise the damage stemming from historical sex abuse cases may be the common ground our two great nations finally see eye to eye on,” said Charles, who will also visit the Rock Of Cashel and Cahir Castle, just to take the bad look off things.

“On top of that, it’ll be just good to get out of the country for a while, what with that whole ‘cash for honours’ thing that’s starting to creep up on us. To be honest, I’m not just learning about how to live in a family with a sex pest, sure we’ve had plenty of those in the past. It’s more to learn how I can pay off people and make my own troubles go away, really”.

Meanwhile Andrew is not scheduled to undertake any Royal activities in the foreseeable future, although members of the family have suggested that perhaps a fishing trip in Mullaghmore in Co. Sligo might be great for clearing his head.