INNER city Dublin teens involved in a number of anti-social incidents recently are being warned that they will now be rounded up and dropped into Northern Ireland’s most troubled areas in a bid to show them ‘what it’s really like to violence’, WWN can confirm.
Following a series of incidents across the city which saw several scrapes and grazes administered and dozens of handbags scattered around the streets, Gardaí and the PSNI agreed to show ‘the little scuts a real riot’.
“These little knob heads are only playing playground tig compared to our boys up here so bring them on up to fuck and we see how man enough they are,” a spokesperson for the Carrickfergus division of the PSNI put, “we’ll drop them off in Newtownabbey with some free stater signage around their scrawny necks see them throw shapes and wave puny penknives then”.
The new initiative called ‘So You Think You’re Hard Enough’ has already sent 30 inner city youths to the heart of ongoing Loyalist violence with 100% of them already left pleading for their family members to help.
“I’ll never do anythin’ ever again, I swear ta God, please get me out of here,” shouted one soiled pants Dublin teen as a petrol bomb landed beside him while a distant sound of gunfire rang through the tear gassed street, “mammy, I’m sorry mammy, please, I’ll be good forever I wills. I’ll never pretend I’m hard or nutin’, please just help me… waaaaah janey mack mammy they’ve real guns an all and they look like they’ll actually kill us instead of just throwing a few slaps”.