Murderer Left Out On Bale By Irish Judge


THE IRISH public was offered a stark reminder of the ever expanding disconnect between Irish judges and appropriate decisions following a judge’s order to remand a serial killer on a bale of hay before his trial begins.

“Do you even law, judge?” remarked a barrister representing the State, who was mindful of similar and recent decisions which baffled not just the public but legal professionals and victim support groups.

Judge Joanne Gavel slapped down any inference that she might be at best incompetent and at worst someone who couldn’t care less of the implications for the safety of the public.

“Be grand. What could go wrong,” Judge Gavel remarked of alleged serial killer Marcel Douen, who will now reside on a bale of hay situated in a field next to a primary school, an old folks home and a sharp knife factory which has no security or CCTV system and no locks on its doors.

Douen has been placed on the hay bale by the judge in circumstance similar to those which allowed him to murder his previous 79 victims, but it is though the serial killer’s promise not to kill anyway is good enough for the Irish judicial system.

“Can’t promise anything, LOL,” confirmed Douen to the judge while winking before adding sure boys will be boys.