“I ‘Unplugged’ From Social Media & So Should You” Confirms Annoying Friend

A LOCAL man from the Waterford area of Ireland, identified by his friends as ‘extremely annoying’ has been hailing the benefits of ‘unplugging’ from social media, WWN has learned.

‘Unplugging’ from social media is whereby an individual quits social media websites and apps such as Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat and Twitter before never shutting up about the fact this is something they have done.

“Aw man, you won’t know yourself. I feel so much better, it’s liberating. Like, I swear, I’m happier and I spend less time on that time-drainer you call a phone,” 29-year-old unplugger, Declan Cranny, told one friend this weekend despite not being asked.

Cranny, long critical of the negative sides of social media and the internet in general confirmed he ‘hardly recognises’ himself now that he’s not a ‘slave to social media like you lot’.

“Cleanse yourself boi, you won’t regret it. Get rid of that technology, does mad things to your brain. I’m a new man,” expressed Cranny, to a friend who had tried to stop him talking for a total of 33 minutes straight.

With no social media distraction the 29-year-old call centre worker now spends most of his time on his phone, however, he now ritualistically clicks on the same 4 or 5 apps and websites, in a way he just couldn’t have done if he was still on social networks.

“I actually feel sorry for anyone who is still addicted to that stuff,” Cranny said in between scrolls of his phone.