Local Father Hopes Child Doesn’t Notice He’s Skipped 10-Pages Of Bedtime Story


A FOOLISH local father has found himself under criticism from his three-year-old daughter after an attempt to skip quickly through her favourite bedtime story in an effort to return to binge watching The Sopranos for the 6th time.

Liberally rushing through the pages of The Very Hungry Caterpillar Waterford father, Tom Scannon spoke at a pace specifically used in the hope that talkative 3-year-old Clara would find it tough to interrupt him.

“I’m just hoping her tiny mind will be too tired to realise what’s going on,” Scannon told WWN, as he turned three pages of the book, hugging it closer to his chest than normal in an effort to disguise his dastardly plan.

Sweat now dripping down his forehead as he realises he is just six pages away from reuniting with series three of the popular mob show The Sopranos, Tom, in a foolish act of hubris attempted to wing the story’s content, making up his own phase of caterpillar hunger.

“And the very hungry caterpillar ordered a Dominos or something like that,” Tom said, seconds before his daughter took issue with the unexpected plot twist.

“Yeah, nice try, but I see through your bullshit,” Clara said, accusing her father of not giving the bedtime story masterpiece the proper respect or enthusiasm.

“Start again ‘in the light of the moon’. Again, again,” Clara demanded, ending her father’s irresponsible attempts to cut reading time down from six minutes, to something closer to three minutes.