World Gonna Try Not Paying Attention To Trump For A Week


THE world has come together this morning to make the challenging but perfectly understandable decision to ignore US President Donald Trump for the week, favouring to just get on with their lives, WWN has learned.

Growing increasingly irritated by the mere mention of the billionaire turned reality TV star turned sexual assault advocate turned politician, vast swathes of the seven billion plus inhabitants of Earth have decided they would like just one week’s escape for his increasingly unhinged carnival act.

“Who knows, if we ignore him he might calm down and focus on the job at hand, even if his policies are ones I can’t abide. Ignoring him might mellow him out,” shared one Irish person, who knew full well such a thing was impossible.

In order for the world to better embrace a Trump-less news week, people have been encouraged to cease all engagement with the internet, avoid reading newspapers, watching TV and listening to radio while also cancelling any communications they receive via telegram and carrier pigeon.

Trump, a known narcissist who craves attention, adoration and acceptance could make ignoring him a difficult endeavour as the media make it almost impossible not to click, dangling the Republican’s latest grostesque comments in front of everyone’s eyes.

“We’ve already had reports of him turning up in the gardens of people’s homes, screaming ‘pay attention to me’ and ‘hey, jerks, look at me or I’ll ban you from America’. Our advice is to close over your curtains and wear ear plugs,” Carla Tennings, head of the Maybe Not Reading Every Minor Story About This Prick Is Not A Bad Idea group.

“Will it make the world a better place, ignoring him like that? Probably not, but it’ll do wonders for your blood pressure,” added the MNREMSATPINABI spokesperson.