UK’s Extreme Surveillance Law Probably Not Worth Reporting, Insists ‘Real News’

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A NEW bill giving the UK intelligence agencies the most sweeping surveillance powers in the western world is ‘probably not worth reporting’, real news outlets have revealed this week.

The Investigatory Powers Bill, which was passed on Thursday with little or no media coverage, would, among other measures, require websites to keep customers’ browsing history for up to a year and allow law enforcement agencies access to help with investigations.

“Sure, why would we bother reporting on the biggest invasion of privacy in the history of the British state?” posed Daily Mail journalist Mark Smith, who was too busy working on World War 3 with Russia articles, “I’ve also got to get four Kardashian pieces out for Monday morning that are guaranteed thousands of shares. No one is going to bother reading about silly old government snooping and hacking”.

The bill gives legal footing to existing powers such as the bulk surveillance and bulk hacking of computers and mobile phones, and allows police and intelligence agencies access to masses of stored personal data, even if the person under scrutiny is not suspected of any wrongdoing.

“Jesus this stuff sounds really boring and dated, to tell you the truth,” pointed out The Sun editor, Tony Gallagher, whose newspaper has on many occasions reported false truths in the past,”Our main goal this week is to tackle this fake news phenomenon. All our journalists are too busy compiling a list of the fake news sites to warn people. No one wants to hear about totalitarian-style surveillance powers – the most intrusive system of any democracy in human history”.

For more on this unimportant bill, click HERE

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