Correcting The Dáil Record More Important Than Correcting Police Force, Confirms Shatter

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FORMER minister for justice Alan Shatter has confirmed the findings in the O’Higgins Report into how Garda whistleblower Maurice McCabe’s complaints were dealt with have vindicated him and that is all that matters, WWN can confirm.

Shatter, in many legal expert’s view, was one of Ireland’s most progressive justice ministers, but the former TD feels that this shouldn’t distract from the fact that he has done nothing wrong and that is more important than anything related to fixing the Garda Síochána.

“Alan’s a bit… odd. He was easily in the top 100 weirdest TDs in the last Dáil. He used to carry around a business card that said ‘you’ve been Shattered’ or ‘you’ve been Shat on’ and he’d go around handing them out to people he totally owned in debates,” revealed a Dáil insider.

While the O’Higgins report highlights myriad ongoing issues with Garda oversight and accountability, it is believed that Shatter is of the opinion that none of this matters at all when compared with correcting the Dáil record on the conflicting accounts of his performance as a minister in the Guerin and O’Higgins reports.

“And so, after the O’Higgins report was published Alan filled the Taosieach’s office with a giant 12 foot wide novelty ‘you been Shat on’ card. I’m not sure he’s very good at letting things go,” confirmed the insider who had a ‘you’ve been Shattered’ card stapled to his forehead.

“I borrowed a biro from him in 1997 and forgot to give it back, like I said not good with letting things go,” concluded the insider.

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