WWN Guide To Waving From The Late Late Show Audience

LIKE jury duty, participating in The Late Late Show audience has been compulsory for Irish citizens since its launch on Friday the 6th July 1962. During that time, over 456 million people have sat in the RTE studio to watch the two hour show, which is also the second oldest running television chat show in the world.

Up until 1997, audience members were handpicked by parish priests from around the country in a lottery system which was adjudicated during Sunday mass in front of worshipers. Refusal to attend the show meant a severe penalty or fine, and a long penance of prayer issued by the Pope himself. In a bid to avoid these punishments, audience members would have to wave idiotically to the cameras in a bid to be seen, starting an age old tradition that is still in operation today.

Here is a handy guide to waving from the Late Late audience, should you be lucky enough to be drafted in to sit during the show:

Act like the cameramen are two year old children who are starving for attention on a busy bus. Play peek-a-boo behind someone’s head in front, but in a subtle way, like you’re not really meaning it. If you are slightly out of shot, shuffle into view.

Start of shyly. Test the water. See if the studio floor manager gives you a dirty look. Small waves, now. You don’t want to be fucked out of there in front of the whole country. This is the modern equivalent of going to mass, so don’t give them viewers something to laugh about. The last thing you want is to become a meme on Her.ie, or a stupid fucking GIF image.

Give it two whole breaks before you make the big wave. The big wave should be practised at home in front of the mirror. The best waves are the ones where you’re half miming the hello. Give the viewer a little peek inside your personal wave. Picture the family members and priest watching at home. To finish the initial wave, look confused; as if you are wondering why no one is waving back at you. This will develop a sense of empathy with the viewer, who may or may not find themselves waving back.

Concluding your wave, giggle uncontrollably like a little girl. Confer through a series of winks and nods to the person beside you, no matter who they are, adding them to the blame.

Repeat for the entirety of the show.