‘Government Of Reform’ Doing Fuck All Reform

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DESPITE touting themselves as a Government of true reform, the Fine Gael/Labour coalition Government have done fuck all real reform, WWN can reveal.

Taoiseach Enda Kenny confirmed yesterday to the public that two referendums were to occur this year; the marriage equality referendum and another on reducing the age restriction on presidential candidates from 35 to 21 years of age.

“Reducing the age restriction for presidential candidates is a huge and monumental step forward in our democracy,” the Taosieach said, “this will change the lives of nearly a dozen politicians in the next few years”.

The decision to go ahead with this referendum over others has angered the public, with many pointing out the Government confirmed they would hold a referendum on reducing the voting age to 16 as early as the summer of 2013.

The recommendation to hold a referendum on the minimum voting age was made by the Constitutional Convention, set up by the Government which is comprised of ordinary citizens.

“Look it, had we known the Constitutional Convention was going to try an empower more people to vote, we wouldn’t have set it up at all,” admitted the Taoiseach to the press yesterday.

“We’re the Government of reform, but the type of reform that is truly important like prioritising voting on reducing the age someone can run for president at, not things like letting people actually vote,” he added.

The Government also took the time yesterday to dismiss notions of getting rid of Ireland’s blasphemy laws with a spokesperson stating “if you think living in a society whereby you can be fined €25,000 for saying something like ‘Jesus was probably a prick in the mornings if he didn’t have coffee’ is some sort of problem, then your priorities are all wrong.”

Meanwhile, several Fine Gael party members under the age of 35 have been busy trying to stop themselves from dreaming about running in the next presidential election should the referendum be successful.

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