4,580,213 Irish People Out Of 4,588,252 Still Don’t Have A Clue About 2008 Bank Guarantee
An extensive survey carried out on behalf of WWN reveals that as many as 4.5 million people living in Ireland don’t really have the slightest clue as to the causes and subsequent repercussions of the 2008 bank guarantee.
Asked to give a basic outline of the financial circumstances surrounding the country when it took on €440 billion worth of liabilities many Irish people choose to draw lewd but accurate sexual acts instead.
WWN can reveal, thanks to a calculator, that only 8,039 Irish people have a basic grasp of the financial crisis that the country has been embroiled in for 5 years. Of these 8,039 people only 8,039 have tried to use their knowledge for their own personal monetary gain.
There was a small sub-section of Irish people surveyed who vehemently defended their knowledge on the subject and began loudly shouting out phrases like ‘Lehman Brothers’, ‘quantitative easing’, ‘ECB interest rates’ and ‘CDOs’ in much the same way one would memorize English poetry quotes for the Leaving Cert.
Many surveyed expressed mild embarrassment at the fact that they knew more about the new series of Love/Hate or the Kardashian family tree than did about the single most important decision in the Nations’ history this side of the 21st century.
One encouraging trend to emerge from the survey was that the vast majority of participants said they would probably look it up on wikipedia when they got home.