New Public Service Cards ‘Absolutely Brilliant’ For Cutting Up Coke, Agree Nations Unemployed


UNEMPLOYED PEOPLE across the country agreed this week that the new social welfare ID cards are ‘absolutely brilliant’ for cutting up coke and other powdered substances.

The public service card, which is currently being rolled out by local dole offices,  has been welcomed across the board due to its durable heavy duty plastic lamination.

“The thick edges really break up the rocks.” said local Waterford drug user Cormac Kenny. “The old cards kept fallin’ ta bits so they were cause they were made of nothin’ boi!”

“Before, I used to be always mixing up me cards with the lads, but now it has me pictures on it an everything, so it’s great.”

Minister for social and family affairs, Joan Burton, said the cards were purposly designed to last up to ten years, regardless of substance abuse.

“We formed a focus group with a selct bunch of unemployed people before the initial designing of the card.”  said Ms. Burton. “The biggest request we had was to strengthen the new all-in-one  card, as the old ones kept ‘melting’.”

The department of social protection said it has issued over 263,000 Public Services Cards to people claiming social welfare and recipients of the Free Travel Pass since the roll out of the scheme last year.